Sharon Osbourne And Jay Leno Have Fucked

Sharon Osbourne revealed a few details of the time she fucked Jay Leno to the Stern show while people listening vomited into their waste baskets at work. Outside of the surprising news that Leno indeed has a functioning human dick, the only information Osbourne offered is that he was a premature ejaculator, which I had him pegged for anyway:

“Well it only took a minute, so I’ll just say, it took a second, that was it.”

Osbourne clearly prefers hours long fuck marathons with half limp smack junkies who can’t finish. Or maybe the problem is just that they’re fucking Sharon Osbourne. Go in the other room and finish on a tissue. Blame it on the smack along with your tarnished solo career. All of this confirms my suspicion that Jay Leno is a diabolical robot who takes pleasure in worshiping mediocrity. This applies to his monologue jokes, an unbridled enthusiasm for interviewing the cast of Dancing With The Stars, and Sharon Osbourne’s pussy.

Photo Credit: Getty Images