Melissa Rummells in a Bikini

The straw-in-human-cranium blood sucking planet invaders from the 138 Water syndicate are running out of girls to coax out onto the beach to pretend their bottled water gives you nice tits. It’s like hitting the theoretical end of the search results on YouPorn. Fuck, I just shuddered. It’s not pleasant to think about, but at some point if you scroll through enough horny shaved granny porn, the possibility exists. We draw near the time when 138 Water will order its tentacle laden advanced fighting forces to erupt from the bodies of fat people at the gym who walk the treadmill at the lowest speed. Then we earthlings shall finally have a visual dictionary photo for the word splatter.

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