Kylie Jenner Promises To Let Someone Do Something

I don’t know precisely when parental intervention is necessitated, but if this were my daughter, after milking her for millions in merchandising deals, I’d probably tough love her into a nunnery somewhere in the Alps until she was able to raise the escape cash . Sure you intentionally raised a jaded and emotionally empty whore child, but that doesn’t mean you can’t pretend it’s not your fault and blame the Internet or sex in movies or Abercrombie ads. Have a good cry on Oprah, people will believe you.

You simply can’t have your seventeen year old daughter offering up her submissive sex in front of millions of other moderate to low levels of intelligence teen girls. Red Bull product placement monies aside. We can’t afford the resulting baby boom. Not with a ton of illegal immigrants still needing jobs.

Photo Credit: Instagram