Chris Brown Seems Stupid High

Chris Brown tweeted his half assed opinion that Ebola is apparently a government engineered form of population control. There was some liberty involved in that summary because it took longer to hash out than Brown’s own opinion:

“I don’t know … But I think this Ebola epidemic is a form of population control. Shit is getting crazy bruh.”

When you try and explain the lunar eclipse to your nephew you have to bullshit most of it because you don’t really know what you’re talking about. Chris Brown is so dumb he is forced to do this when ordering at IHOP. Silver dollar pancakes, huh? Can you fucking eat those?

Black folks are notoriously suspicious that everything that hurts or kills black people came about through a government conspiracy. That’s only right like half the time. Chris Brown is more likely come by his social and political views by way of contact high with the one dude in his posse who has Daily Kos accidentally bookmarked on his Galaxy browser. When Chris Brown ends up in real prison he will inevitably grow a beard and wear reading glasses, at which point his mind numbingly stupid regurgitations will be met with esteem from the hand full of nineteen year olds forced to listen to him because he is bogarting the cafeteria table.

Photo Credit: Twitter