Brazil’s Miss Ass Isn’t In Brazil

You can only sleep with so many soccer players before FIFA is going to ask you to leave the host country. It’s some kind of rule to prevent international skirmishes from breaking out at the World Cup. Brazilian ass model Andressa Urach claims she slept with world famous soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo last year, because, well, it can’t hurt. She did win the Miss Butt Butt competition in Brazil a couple years ago and routinely gets wasted drunk on the local Big Brother ripoff. But that’s not the sum total of the career this super chunk assed bikini model wants. There was a time when these geek show mainstays couldn’t dream to reach higher than rapper booty call or dead barrio prostitute. But in 2014, if you’ve got big tits and a barrel-shaped ass, the sky’s the limit. Andressa, I hope you get everything you want. You seem sweet.

Photo Credit: Splash