Kaley Cuoco Applauds Her Own Big Fake Titties

It’s refreshing to hear one Hollywood actress say that her implants were the best thing to ever happen to her, as Kaley Cuoco did in Cosmo magazine, right there between the same blowjob tips the magazine has been serving up since ’77. The standard refrain from actresses when discussing plastic surgery is first to vehemently deny, then shift to regret and distancing, and ultimately, dramatic lamentation. Watching completely self-absorbed people get caught in a needless lie is like watching penis sausage being made. You will not stick around to watch the second penis go in the grinder. Kaley Cuoco’s shockingly honest revelation is probably related to all the newlywed shtupping and the high she feels from recently moving into Khloe Kardashian’s old McMansion. Who wouldn’t feel femininely charged using the same basin where Khloe would routinely sponge-bathe herself to a tear-filled orgasm thinking about all her diet cheats. Kaley knows her bigger tits got her jobs and promotions and opportunities and men she wouldn’t otherwise have secured with normal human mammaries. She’s got more sac than those ballplayers who lied and cried before Congress about enhancing their own bodies. Kaley Cuoco, you are the big fake tittied wind beneath my wings.

Photo Credit: CBS, Cosmopolitan