Jesse Ventura Is Public Enemy Number Nuts

Former wrestling governor Jesse Ventura has gone off the grid in Mexico to broadcast his latest rebel without a cause show. He fled down Mexico way because he believes that the U.S. government is following him around with surveillance drones. Ventura has long been a conspiracy nut who believes that the government is run by a secret Illuminati-like cabal. He thinks that we live in a fascist state that wants to turn us all into zombies or something.

“I’m off the grid. I move about with my TV show so that the drones can’t find me and you won’t know exactly where I am. As long as we have solar power and we can reach the satellite.”

While our government is no doubt up to tons of nefarious unpublicized shit, I think the Star Chamber has more to worry about than someone called “The Body” spouting a bunch of half-baked theories to his fifteen member audience. If the government is as all powerful as he thinks then him moving around between various Acapulco hotel rooms probably won’t keep him safe. I know the NSA bugged Americans and that Facebook sells all our data to the Taliban or whatever, but the only drones following Jesse Ventura live in his bald mulleted head.