Jon Gosselin Wants Custody Of His Sextuplets

Now that Kate Gosselin is once again, at the very least, a temporary laughing stock after her two oldest daughters embarrassed her during their interview on Today, Jon Gosselin is finding that as many people as he can count on a hand kind of give a shit about what he thinks about it. Apparently he has known that his kids hate their mom all along – shocking, I know – and now he’s finally doing something, because InTouch reported that the former reality star and douchiest dad of the 00s is suing for primary custody of the sextuplets. “They live in fear of Kate,” he told the magazine, “Every time I see them, they tell me they want to live with me.”

That’s interesting because Jon lives in a shitty cabin with no TV or internet, so even if they do actually want to live with him, they’ll be begging Cruella de Vil to come pick them up within a week. Any child would deal with constant neglect and humiliation if it at least means getting HBO.

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