ADVERTISEMENT
November 29, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments
I’m not sure why a bunch of you stopped looking at Miley’s tits or ass for any amount of time to notice her face. You might as well start twerking to her music. But some untold number of you insisted on directing me to look at her chin at the American Music Awards. I stopped drinking my Thanksgiving ale for half a second, zoomed in, and there the fuck it was — a burgeoning billy goat gruff. Or scruff. Or just the makings of a Duck Dynasty bandwagoner. Miley’s got a fucking beard. Maxim’s already pulled their January cover to revise for the World’s Hottest Bearded Lady. Jesus. I mean, literally, Miley might be turning into Jesus. What if she’s the Messiah instead of just a twink who badly needs a facial waxing? Thanks for ruining my Thanksgiving.