Chris Brown Wants to Understand Why People Get Upset When He Hits Them

You may remember that last time Chris Brown went to anger management counseling, he learned that he can’t be leaving visible marks on his bitches when he gets to feeling like a boiling teapot. But that was court appointed counseling. In the manner of the new celebrity justice S.O.P., Chris Brown has checked himself into anger management rehab before he’s formally rung up on his latest assault case.

“We talked today and he said, ‘I want to take some time and do a little introspection and understand everything that’s going on around me,'” lawyer Mark Geragos told the Daily News. “It was his decision, and he should be applauded.”

Yes, that lingo sounds exactly like Chris Brown. We should applaud a man who wants to understand everything going on around him. Like understanding that surprised dude standing over there with the bloody nose you just sucker punched in the face. Or that big ass bodyguard who travels with you to finish off your fights. Or that policeman coming toward you yelling at you to put your hands behind your back. All this understanding is going to take some quiet time. Preferably along the beach in Malibu with complementary WiFi. Dick.

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