Kristen Stewart Banging Rupert Sanders Again (Allegedly)

(Photo above is from the last time Kristen got caught with Rupert as he went down on her clam in a car during a break from shooting Snow White.)

Shortly after her cuckolded corpse of a boyfriend Robert Pattinson flew out of Los Angeles on Sunday evening, Kristen Stewart was photographed getting into a black Acura, the same model Sanders owns, with a man who bears a striking resemblance to the Snow White and the Huntsman director. Hey, his wife Liberty Ross filled for divorce in January, he’s basically a free man. The only one who looks like a dumb ass this time around is Pattinson and I don’t even know if he has feelings. There’s more personality in my dildo.

Anyway, haters gonna hate on Kristen, but I’m totally on her side on this one. The sexual chemistry between an older man and a younger woman is a perfectly natural and healthy thing. Older men are better in bed because they’re not instinctively desperate to cover the planet with their seed. Plus, they have real jobs and don’t live with their parents. I’m 25 and you couldn’t pay me to jump into the sack with anyone who isn’t at least ten years my elder. As for why Rupert would want to bang a girl half his age, well, men aren’t that hard to figure out. It’s obviously true love.