Jennifer Aniston is engaged

It’s been almost 9 years since Angelina Jolie replaced Nicole Kidman in ‘Mr. and Mrs. Smith’, which is where Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie met which led to him divorcing Jennifer Aniston because Angelina Jolie is better than Jennifer Aniston in every possible way. 9 years.

And yet Aniston STILL talks about Pitt ALL the time. Or moves in next door to him. Or scouts places for her wedding (even though she’s not engaged) 10 days after he proposed to Jolie. And when she finally does get engaged, which happened Friday, it’s one day before Pitt and Jolie were rumored to get married.

So is that all a coincidence or is there a pattern? I simply don’t know, I’m not the Mentalist. What I do know is that Pitt has been dating Jolie all this time, while Aniston has dated Vince Vaughn, Paul Sculfor, Josh Hopkins, Chris Gartin, Harry Morton, Jason Lewis, Kevin Connelly, John Mayer, Gerard Butler, and Justin Theroux. She’ll date literally anyone. Girls who marry inmates that they met online have more dignity.