Jessica Simpson uses her boobs to get out of tickets

For now let’s just ignore how dumb it is for People to have Jessica Simpson on the 2011 Most Beautiful list, I’m sure I’m go in to great detail about that later, for now let’s deal with the other dumb part of her profile, and that is her claim that her tits get her out of parking tickets.

Being well-endowed since sixth grade, the blonde bombshell points out that “there’s no way to hide them as much as you want to bandage your boobs down.” Simpson, 30, has since learned to embrace her chest as her “best accessory,” telling PEOPLE, “Now I can make my way in and out of parking tickets: Show the girls and give a wink!”

“And you should see me at Dunkin when they have the cocoa jelly donuts! I let that kid just straight up titty fuck me!”

(image source = flynet)