the new Tomb Raider movie will have a new Tomb Raider

E-harmony rejected my profile because I said I was looking for a super hot girl with long hair and big tits who dresses slutty. I should have bought the rights to the Tomb Raider franchise because then I could have put that exact same thing in Entertainment Weekly.

Producer Graham King (The Departed, The Town) announced today that he’s acquired the film rights to Lara Croft, and plans to reboot the Tomb Raider franchise … (he) intends to bring her back to theaters in 2013. 
King describes the new plan in a press release as a “reboot.” He knows Jolie well, having recently worked with her on The Tourist, but she hasn’t expressed much interest in returning to the character.

Jolie was 25 in the first Tomb Raider in 2001, and 27 in the second one in 2003, but Harrison Ford is 90 and they put him in Indiana Jones 4. His punches looked like a cat trying to swim and they made a whole movie about it.