Lindsay Lohan will not be going to jail. At all.

The Lindsay Lohan probation drama began because Lindsay was arrested, twice, for a DUI and possession of cocaine, among other things. She was placed on probation, which she violated several times. So now she’s on probation for violating that probation, which she violated in under a month with two positive drug tests. So what will happen to her tomorrow when she faces a judge for all this?

Absolutely nothing.

“One of two things could happen,” Deputy District Attorney Danette Meyers explains to E! News. “The judge could remand her into custody and set her bail, and she could bail out tomorrow. Or she can come in and just admit the violation and he could sentence her right there, I’m not sure what he’ll do.”

So if her remands her into custody she’ll make bail and get out, but if she admits she violated her probation, that’s 30 days in jail, right? We were told every violation carried a minimum of 30 days in jail?

But this 30-day sentence would be subject to the realities of jail overcrowding, which means Lindsay would go to jail for booking and probably be released an hour or two later.

What a fantastic system. So after 3 years of this, Lindsay is still on drugs, which she’ll admit to in court but apparently never be charged with, she’ll only be charged with violating her probation. And she’ll get locked up for 2 hours. I got locked up longer than that when I wouldn’t eat my vegetables.