Tuesday afternoon headlines

NOBODY PUTS BABY IN A CORNER – but they can put her in a dress with big ruffles, because Jennifer Grey will be a contestant on ‘Dancing With The Stars’, along with Brandy, Florence Henderson, Audrina Patridge, and Bristol Palin. The men will be Kurt Warner, David Hasselhoff, The Situation, Michael Bolton, Kyle Massey, Rick Fox and Margaret Cho. Remember, mini dresses can set the dance floor ablaze in hot red tones or shades of pink or purple. They’ll make heads turn and add pizzazz to your performance. That tip goes for the fellas too, since I now assume you’re all gay. (la times)

JOHN CUSACK – was asked about the proposed mosque near Ground Zero, and he wrote, “I AM FOR A SATANIC DEATH CULT CENTER AT FOX NEWS HQ AND OUTSIDE THE OFFICES (OF) DICK ARMEY AND NEWT GINGRICH-and all the GOP WELFARE FREAKS”. Because those people are against the mosque, and Cusack believes in free expression. Unless you disagree with him, in which case he’ll advocate murdering you. It makes a lot of sense if you think about it. (twitter)

JESSICA SIMPSON – is flaunting “her voluptuous figure” in these pictures, according to the Daily Mail. I don’t know what it said after that though because I opened two pictures of Jessica at once and my monitor fell through the table. (daily mail)