eva longoria can clear up this nicollette sheridan thing

Yesterday it was reported that Nicollette Sheridan is suing Marc Cherry, the creator of ‘Desperate Housewives’, and alleging that he slapped her in the face, then fired her when she threatened to report him. It’s a wild story, but luckily Eva Longoria was on Ryan Seacrests radio show today, and she’s probably really clear about this whole thing.

“I’m really confused about this whole thing. I would love to see her to find out if everything’s okay.”
Longoria says she doesn’t know the details of the alleged incident, “I know they did have a thing on set,” she says, adding that Cherry “probably could not harm a fly.”
“I guess it was a couple years ago. I wasn’t on set when it happened but apparently this incident had happened and she felt it was wrong,” she says.
When asked to clarify what kind of incident it was, Longoria says that Sheridan “was doing a scene, something that [Marc] was showing her how to do … Honestly I wish I knew.”
And while she hopes things work out for Sheridan, Longoria is also crossing her fingers the show will get past the lawsuit. “I love the show so much,” she says, “I would hate for anything tarnish the reputation of the show.”

We should judge people based on appearance way more than we do now. It seems like that would work. I think everyone from the middle east is here to kill me, for example, and Asian girls are monogamous yet slutty. And so far so good on both counts. And since Marc Cherry looks like a really tall infant, I’ve decided he’s not going around slapping women. And then I would say, “Your witness, councilor” and everyone would be real impressed by my Aristotelean logic.