Eminem was in on it

Scott Aukerman was the head writer at Sunday nights MTV Movie Awards, and while not thinking up uncomfortably awful jokes, he wrote on his blog that Eminem was fully in on the joke with Bruno, and it went down exactly as planned. The Sun UK says…

But Scott insists Eminem was in on the prank – and agreed to have Bruno’s naked rear just inches from his face.
He wrote on his blog: “Yes, the Bruno/Eminem incident was staged.
“That’s all anyone wants to talk about, so let’s get it out of the way.
“They rehearsed it at dress and yes, it went as far as it did on the live show then.”

If you’d like to know why the MTV show was so devoid of any happiness whatsoever and get a quick look at the sad state of Hollywood comedy writing, check out Scotts tumblr and twitter.  Here’s a Twitter he wrote about snowmen:

A lot of 3’s in snowmen, huh? 3 snowballs to make it. 3 charcoals for its buttons. And THREE DEGREES WHEN YOU MAKE IT!?!?!?

I shit you not.   This guy has been nominated for an Emmy.  As a comedy writer.   There is so much wrong with this joke, I can’t even…

I gotta go … lie down.  I don’t feel so good.

Okay I’m back.  I can’t think about the snowman joke without getting deeply and profoundly depressed, but I will point out that it’s composed of 4 observations, and every single one of them is wrong.  The premise is wrong, the examples are only true if you’re drawing a snowman for some Christian Family Activity pamphlet, and is his punch-line that it’s cold out during winter?   Aha!   Now I get it Oh wait.  I bet he’s got some real zingers about sand castles too.  Let me guess, 100 trips to get the sand…

Oh but there’s more.   Some jokes that didn’t make it on to MTV.

– Taylor Lautner gained 30 pounds of muscle to be in the Twlght sequel. It’s paying off -I hear “New Moon” is like a vampire movie on steroids
– “She has the last name of a carnival ride, and he has the last name of a tree. Please welcome Anna Faris Wheel and Chris Pine Tree.”
That joke was killed because we were contractually obligated to mention “Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs” – which fucked up its rhythm.

The Sun must have edited his statements about Eminem and Bruno, because if this doofus didn’t begin things by saying, “I could tell you but then I’d have to kill you”, I will eat my hat.