Portrait of a Lady

Britney has come a long way since she bottomed out almost two years ago, when she shaved her head and did stuff like in the banner picture, but that doesn’t mean she’s not still a hot mess.  Page Six says…

The pop tart took time off from her “Circus” tour to do an Elle magazine shoot, our spy says, and it was a disaster. “They dressed her in all these beautiful couture clothes — and, well, let’s just say she forgot what time of the month it was. It wasn’t pretty.”

I actually find this reassuring.  It would freak me out if Britney changed too much.  It would be like we woke up in some alternate reality. Britney would be real classy, running backs would all be Mexican and Hitler would be on the dollar bill.

(let’s relive the magical night from the banner in terrifying high-res: very very very NSFW pics here, here, here, here, and here)