LEONARDO DICAPRIO IS COOL

In three years, Leonardo DiCaprio has only been on this stupid page a handful of times, and not once was it ever for anything bad.  No DUIs, no lawsuits, no drugs or scandalous breakups.  He’s arguably the best actor of this generation and yet for a seven month span last year the only time he was mentioned here was when he went to Knotts Berry Farm with his girlfriend.  Needless to say his dignity is pissing me off.  If he could be more of a white trash whore like Britney or Paris and punch out some teen prostitute it would really help me out.  But I shouldn’t hold my breath, according to IMDb…

He says, "Actually I'm not in the tabloids anymore. I am sometimes, but I've watched the culture change. I'm old hat. And I love it. You know what it is with me? This is something I'd like to clarify. I've heard people say, 'Because you hide, it makes you seem ungrateful.'"The mere fact that these – I'll use the word piles – are earning money from exploiting my image is the only reason I hide myself or am not a photo-friendly person. I do not like the way they conduct themselves. I think they're disrespectful and dangerous. The reason I don't pose or smile or that I seem mad is that I don't want them to make a living off my private life."

Well la-di-da your majesty.  You think you’re so great, with your quiet professionalism and self-respect.  I don't need your kind anyway, not as long as there are dimwit retards like Lindsay around.  If I ever need a story I can just get behind her at the pool, then say "RING RING, RING RING" out of the corner of my mouth, then hold my thumb and pinky up to my ear and mouth while saying, "uh huh … uh huh … oh no … oh my god really?!?!"  Then I hang up.  "Oh no Lindsay, there’s a fire, you better take off your suit and lie down!"