ANNES EX IS NOT HAPPY IN JAIL

Raffaello Follieri of course was Anne Hathaways boyfriend, seemingly a wealthy Italian playboy, but in reality a conman who stole millions from investors who believed he was a representative of the Vatican entrusted with upgrading and buying Roman Catholic churches across the US.  Now he's serving 6 years in jail, which turns out, is unpleasant.  The always great New York Daily News says…

Rats roam freely, there's excrement in the shower and Follieri shares a windowless dorm with 120 other shower-deprived men.  "He says the stench is intolerable," his lawyer Flora Edwards wrote. "Clearly no one should be subjected to these conditions."The 30-year-old playboy pleaded guilty to bankrolling a high-flying lifestyle that included trips with Hathaway to exotic locales on private jets, a dog walker and $37,000-a-month rent for his Fifth Avenue apartment with money stolen from investors.Follieri complained that his medication has been confiscated and that he's been short of breath.  He hasn't been able to eat because the food appears to be spoiled and the toilet and showers are "unspeakably unsanitary," Edwards said, adding that Follieri has been running a fever.

Whatever.  I'm not the one in jail so it turns out I don't care what their life is like.  What I do care about is Hathaways perplexing status as some hot piece.  She's not ugly of course, but she's not hot either.  Not by a mile.  I know guys see a big mouth and get excited, because that’s the part where the penis goes to start and finish sex, but hers is ridiculous.  I could put my dork in there and rattle it around like one of those triangular diner bells cowboys use.  And there’s no way I have the self-confidence to keep going after that.