PARIS HILTON IS AN ANGEL OF MERCY

Paris Hilton says she wants to donate stacks of her used clothes and shoes to children's charities, because she says she has more clothes than she could ever possibly wear.  Paris says:

"I have, like, a million clothes and more than 500 pairs of shoes, so I'm going to give a bunch of them to orphanages and children's hospitals. I never wear something twice."

That's kinda touching.  Because what little kids with no bone marrow want is a Zac Posen gown spotted with blood and Red Bull, and a stain of semen that, since it hit Paris Hilton, I have to assume is in the shape of a pentagram.