LINDSAY LOHAN IS AWESOME

Lindsay Lohan sounds like she would be fun to hang out with.  Even when she's in rehab it's just a nonstop party.  Doin drugs and blowin' guys, she's like a damn amusement park.  Female First says she was caught with drugs at Cirque Lodge rehab – much like she was rumored to be high while at Promises rehab – and they forced her to take a drug test, which she failed.  A source said"

"Lindsay got called into the director's office on August 15 and was questioned about drugs. When ordered to take a drug test, she reluctantly complied but screamed and cursed at the medical director before storming out the room. She was told that if she couldn't conform to the program she'd have to leave."

And ShowbizSpy says she was caught having sex in the bathroom:

“Staff were alerted to the bathroom because there were strange noises coming from inside and two voices could be heard,” a source says. “When they opened the door, Lindsay was in a compromising position with the guy – who’s also at Cirque for drug rehab.”“Rumors spread like wildfire across the place that they’d been having sex. When staff found them they were all flustered and Lindsay’s hair was all over the shop,” the source adds. “She was livid that she was given the miserable task of cleaning the bathrooms so the theory was she’d do something really dirty in there.”

I seriously don't even know what the hell that means.  Banging dudes is Lindsay’s answer to everything.  It's purely coincidence she was asked to do a "dirty" job beforehand.  Jesus, what pagan cavemen are running this GD place.  "Bird stay in tree when moon come from sky.  Crop die.  God angry!  GRRARRARRRARRR!"

UPDATE – "7 days"