KELLY BROOK IS PERFECT

Science has determined that British model Kelly Brook is the perfect woman and has all the scientific markers which determine what men find attractive.  Her 34E-24-34 measurements, big eyes and long dark hair make her the perfect physical specimen, according to my penis researchers.  A few of the highlights from the … umm … "report":

THE HAIR – Kelly has been blessed with naturally long, thick chestnut curls. Hair extensions are definitely not required. Shiny locks have long been a marker of health and therefore make a woman instantly more attractive to men.THE FACE – Dr Ben Jones of Aberdeen University's Face Laboratory said: "Men from all cultures are drawn to a babyish face with big eyes and arched eyebrows which seem consistent with high estrogen levels."THE BOOBS – Her 34E bust has no need of a silicone boost.THE WAIST – "Super-beautiful" women have waists a third smaller than their hips and three-quarters their bust measurement, say researchers at the University of Gdansk in Poland.THE HIPS – Researchers at the University of Texas say the perfect woman's hip to waist ratio is 0.7 – her exact measurements. THE LEGS – At 5ft 8in tall she has longer pins than the average woman which makes her, according to experts at the University of Gdansk, more beautiful.

I don't know what 16-year-old boy funded this study but it's hard to argue with the results.  I would have included "Asian" in there somewhere but I'm a fancy gentleman who doesn't shy away from such erotic delights.  England seems to have a bunch of chicks like this, which is probably why it doesn't have a space program or gold medals because WHO THE HELL CARES.  TITS!(WARNING – these pictures are Kelly topless on the beach with bf Billy Zane.  Who is also topless.  Rawr!)