LOS ANGELES IS TOUGH ON CRIME

Proving once again that law enforcement in Los Angeles will do everything they can to kiss the ass of celebrities, officials have already hand selected the cellmate of Paris Hilton, choosing a non-violent offender currently serving time for reckless driving. TMZ says:

Sources tell TMZ that jailers were looking for someone who they believe will not try to cash in on Hilton's stay. The woman is already in the cell that Paris will be in … waiting for a touch of Hilton.Sources also tell TMZ that jailers are already conducting searches of anything electronic — they are prohibiting cameras, cellphones and the like. We're told a memo has gone out to the staff, warning them that anyone who takes pictures of Paris will be disciplined — i.e., fired.Our sources say a "written protocol" has already been prepared especially for Paris' stay, detailing "when and how things should be done for her."

Aww, that's so cute!  You guys are getting a big star next month, and you're already planning "how things should be done for her".  Just like a fancy hotel would!  Maybe you can put on a play for her or sing that "Farwell, So Long" song from the Sound of Music on her first night.  "I leave and heave a sigh and say good bye – goodbyyyyyyeeeee!"  Tee-hee, it's a big party!!!

(i hate to go and leave this pretty sight)