JENNA JAMESON IS ON TOP OF THE WORLD

In the past few months, XXX superstar Jenna Jameson has lost a disturbing amount of weight and she blames it on two things.  One, her pending divorce has grown very nasty and increasingly public and two, she underwent a botched vaginoplasty, which could end up ruining her career.  Now, all of her personal problems are effecting her relationship with her fans.  The New York Post says:

Jameson has lost so much weight that she's almost unrecognizable and was a disappointment to fans at last weekend's Exxxotica convention in Miami Beach. According to one insider, "She was contractually supposed to show up for a total of six hours in two days yet arrived late both days and blew off the event 45 minutes early on the second day of her appearance." The source continued, "When fans openly asked her about her [botched surgery] and why she was so thin, her people cut them off. But she shouldn't be standing in front of an old photo of herself when she's about 40 pounds skinnier than she was." The buxom blonde also refused interviews with the media – including CNN's Anderson Cooper. She left the event early with her martial-artist boyfriend, Tito Ortiz, when she saw that rival porn star Tera Patrick had a longer line of waiting fans than she did.

I've seen Jenna Jameson's vagina a thousand times, and never once did I think it needed a little work, but whatever, because now she's apparently ruined it.  And she's right to freak out.  Her entire life is based on her vagina.  If she can't show it off for money, she's useless, she's basically a kangaroo now.  She can use her vagina as a pouch to hold her keys or pens and stuff.  Maybe her wallet and cell phone.  And that actually sounds pretty useful.  Stuff some running shoes and water bottles and towels in there and hit the gym.  Pretty much whatever she might need, for work, home or on the go!