TOM CRUISE IS A LUUUNNATIC

Katie Holmes is due to start shooting a comedy called "Mad Money" with Diane Keaton and Queen Latifah in Shreveport, La., next month and sources say Tom Cruise has made it clear to all that he will be a constant presence on set.  A source says:

"Tom has called producers and told them he will be on set every day. He wants to observe what's going on and will probably help Katie out."

Except replace the words "observe" and "help" with the words "stalk" and "gather intel".  This movie is yet another strange turn in Katie’s career since she became involved with Cruise.  Page Six says:

Cruise was said to be upset over her sex scene in last year's "Thank You for Smoking" – which was mysteriously missing during several festival screenings … Holmes gave up her role in the upcoming "Batman" sequel, and some in Hollywood said it was because of the romantic scenes she would have had with Christian Bale … The insider added, "Katie's agent, Hylda Queally (at CAA), chose this role (in "Mad Money") for her because it is a female buddy movie. There is no love interest and she wouldn't be kissing anyone or have a sex scene."  Acheson declined comment on the script – which our source, who has seen it, said was "atrocious."

When asked for a comment, Cruise said, "what's the big deal.  Look, if I'm so 'crazy,' then why did the aliens choose me to be their spokesperson to the people of Earth?  Seems like a pretty important position, if you ask me."