FERGIE IS DISAPOINTING

No one asked, but Fergie wants to set the record straight that she and her boyfriend Josh Duhamel are not engaged and not expecting to start a family.  Fergie says:

"I've heard that I've been engaged probably about seven times, and pregnant, but I've never been either.  Sorry to disappoint."

Actually that is kind of disappointing.  Fergie has had so much plastic surgery she looks like a damn totem pole now and it would be fun to see what a kid looks like with her natural features.  She could give birth to a cartoon cat and it wouldn't be surprising in the least.  Even if it is human, all that meth Fergie has done should pay off nicely.  The baby will arrive and the nurse in the delivery room will stumble backwards, knock over a cart and say "Santa Maria!  Es El Diablo!" as she makes the sign of the cross and the doctor yells, "Nurse, get a hold of yourself!"  Seriously though, Josh is gay, right.