HER FINENESS IS A PAIN IN THE ASS

TMZ says that Halle Berry is spending $57,000 to paint the cabinets in the kitchen of her Beverly Hills home.  The cabinets are already built and in place and the company has been hired just to stain them.  Ahem, for 57,000 dollars.  Fearing this wasn’t insane enough, Halle has ordered that the workers not initiate conversation with her and must answer any questions in a very specific way.  TMZ says:

First, any worker is prohibited to approach Berry while in the home or on the premises. Second, no one is allowed to speak to the A-list Miss B at any time. Finally, the only approved interaction is if Halle speaks to you, then you may answer Her Fineness.

Whatever.  Sexy people like Halle and me can get away with this because we're all hips and lips, twisted steel and sex appeal.  Halle is so damn fine she can do whatever she wants and guys will still put up with her.  We could go to dinner with my parents and she could break out pictures that ranked the top 100 dudes she swallowed and I’d just stare at her tits and giggle, maybe occasionally say “I love you, boo-boo.”