ANNA NICOLE SMITH IS CRAZY, ENTERTAINING

Larry Birkhead, the man thought to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby until last week when Smith's attorney Howard K. Stern claimed to be the true father, filed suit Monday demanding that Smith return to the United States from the Bahamas with her newborn daughter and submit the baby to a paternity test.  Birkhead's lawsuit contains several explosive allegations, namely…

  – Smith is taking methadone (the drug that helped kill her son Daniel) and Stern has been facilitating her habit.   – Smith fled to the Bahamas to keep her baby from being tested for drugs.   – Stern is claiming to be the baby’s father for his own financial gain (such as selling their "wedding " photos to People Magazine for 1 million dollars)

  – Smith had asked a third unidentified man to say that he was the father of her child, a plan which didn't work out because the man had already had a vasectomy.

Yikes.  How does someone this insane and stupid and high even stay alive this long, much less end up rich.  Honest to God, if she went to court, and Benjamin Franklin flew in on a winged horse and screamed “You can do it Anna Nicole!“ it would be the most normal that has happened in this saga yet.