People who say the commercials are the best part about the Super Bowl have never seen Katy Perry sing over a pre-recorded track to staged multicultural fans screaming their heads off. Until they allow tits on network television, the... READ MORE

Back in the days when you could eat steak rare and colonic with Camel smoke and bang your secretary over a metal desk, men kept pin up calendars on their wall. Now that move will cost you two weeks... READ MORE

Sometimes I wonder if I wouldn’t be happier f I were having copious sex with a Brazilian supermodel girlfriend. It’s easy to think so. When my landlord told me I was late with rent again, I’d quit stressing and... READ MORE

Adriana Lima seems like a talented actress. I hate to critique her style but maybe a little lighter on the ass bruises for her thong work. It’s always fun to imagine how an attractive woman comes by her sub-gluteal... READ MORE

I hate to see anybody unhappy. Seeing a good looking woman with a melancholy look makes me want to take her out for a drink while we mock the less attractive people around us. Myself excluded as I’m buying.... READ MORE

Europeans are always fucking things up. D-Day is as good a day as any other to remember how many times we’ve had to pull Europe’s ass out of the fryer. Do we get so much as a thank you.... READ MORE

It turns out the Cannes Film Festival wasn’t all about being a shirtless dickhead and having Paris Hilton rub her sweaty moose knuckle all over his baby boner for Justin Bieber. According to Us Weekly, the 20-year old singer... READ MORE

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