MADONNA JUST MAKES STUFF UP

Now almost 30 days after the fact, Madonna has spoken to Meredith Vieira for the Today Show and revealed all new, totally-not-made-up details concerning her "adoption" of Davie Banda, the sickly African orphan who is not sick or an orphan.  According to people.com, Madonna now says she offered to sponsor Davie, paying for his care while he stayed in his village under the care of his father, but was turned down because Davies father "felt in his heart" that Madonna should be the one to raise him.  Madonna then confirmed Madonna’s claims:

"When I met (Davies father), I said I would be happy to … to bring (David) back to your village and help you financially raise him.  And he said no … I think he truly felt in his heart of hearts that – and who knows if he was telling me the truth – that he would have a better life with me. So, when he said no, that was my sign that it was my responsibility to look after him."

When asked for a comment, Davies father said:

Umm, yeah.  Because no one asked Davies dad about any of this.  But when Madonna described Davie as "very flirtatious. And he's hysterically funny," the kiss ass Vieira said that sounded just like Madonna!  Oh, te-he-he-he!  And then they laughed like hyenas in Madonnas mansion over tea and tried to figure out who was less hagged and wrinkly.  It was a draw.