Roxy Horner Pulls Winning Ticket in DiCaprio Cock Lottery

Akin to ripping open Wonka Bars to find the gold leaf ticket, pretty girls across the Western Hemisphere straighten out their finest frocks and polish their IUDs on the chance the next knock on the door might be Leonardo DiCaprio with his dick hanging out of his pants. Grab the brass ring, ladies. You’ve got thirteen evenings over a six month period to pamper the shlong of Hollywood’s most famous model banger and extremely pragmatic environmentalist. 

Roxy Horner seems to have summer covered. The British model has been seen with DiCaprio repeatedly during private jet sex trips to England. According to an anonymous source that the Daily Mail created and is most likely Roxy’s mum, the couple are very smitten. Also covered in a mix of cum and the Lysol bombs Leo unleashes post-coital as a just in case. DiCaprio is ten moves ahead and already plotting what magazine cover he’ll score Horner to make pushing her out of his airplane with a goodbye parachute more palatable. Like herpes, NDAs are forever.

_{Photo Credit: Instagram}