Dean McDermott Headed to a Fate Worse Than Sex With Tori Spelling

Dean McDermott’s calling in life seems to be making babies. It’s not a bad gig if you can get it, especially if you never have to pay for them. 

In 2006, McDermott’s wife Mary Jo Eustace filed for divorce when she learned her occasionally acting husband was porking Tori Spelling because, frankly, that’s super embarrassing. The couple had a eight year old son at the time. McDermott went on to marry Spelling and make five more kids in rapid fire succession. This despite the fact that neither McDermott or Spelling were much into working and Spelling was refusing to take cash from her uber-rich widowed mother, Candy Spelling. She would later back off that prohibition when eviction notices starting coming due. But in large part, she’s never taken a fat check.

The result has been a slow turn toward grifting. With reports of unpaid rent and moves in the night and more recently, Tori Spelling’s slip and fall into hibachi lawsuit settled with Benihana. McDermott almost never works, save for a recent short lived gig on “Canadian Chopped” on TV Food Network. The result, the dude is way behind on his child support for his son to Eustace and facing potential jail time.

Unlike these rich celebrity kid payment after divorce amounts, McDermott’s tab to his wife for his son is $1,500 a month. Kid seems to want to eat and have clothes. He’s now nineteen and Eustace claims their son’s owed $100,000 in unpaid child support including interest penalties, including current obligations McDermott’s supposed to help pay the kids rent while he’s at college, but his checks keep bouncing. Eustace’s decided to make a public show of McDermott’s largely off-again child support over the past decade by filing a motion of contempt with the court and trying to embarrass him in the papers. 

McDermott’s responded by claiming the high ground of victimhood via the DailyMail, which will print anybody’s story so long as they can put the word “Exclusive” on it:

‘This is a woman who is trying to exact revenge. She’s constantly in the press, calling me a deadbeat dad and saying these charges are for delinquent child support. They are not.’

McDermott later goes on to amend the record and admit that he’s at most eight months behind on child support and that it’s the interest on former missed payments that’s forming the big number he owes:

‘I do not deny that I owe her money. I have tried countless times to work things out with her. She knows I’m an actor, she knew that when she married me all those years ago. The business is up and down. I’m not making a ton of money right now.

McDermott continued on, calling himself a great guy who everybody loves, a great dad, and a great husband. The great guy bit seems subjective, the great dad claim perhaps less hard to make given the inability to pay $18K a year for your son, and the husband bit tarnished by being unemployed and famously having cheated on your wife in a Canadian hotel as discussed on the reality show you signed up for to make survival cash.

Probably time to suck up to mom-in-law again and grab some bread to make this go away. It’s humiliating, but not so much as writing bad checks for your kid’s basics. In hindsight, maybe you shouldn’t have made five additional children in nine years if you’re in the infinite down cycle of your up and down business.

Actors and entertainers exist largely in two modes. Broke and desperate. Or successful and obnoxious. The former will cry and mope and demand pity. The latter will fuck every woman he can find to make up for the ego bruising times. Consider marrying an accountant. He may not have amazing facial hair, but living with a man who doesn’t act like a child might suit you.

Ten years ago while fondling her awkwardly positioned fake breasts, McDermott likely never imagined that his meal ticket would refuse to partake in a couple hundred million in family fortune and look to him for rent money. About time for a rear-ender induced case of whiplash. 

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