Lindsay Lohan Calls on the Forces of Dead Maya Angelou

Maya Angelou was the poet of super lazy people. A Nike slogan writer for the largely unread. Death was no end for Angelou Pablum. Re-posters of her shlock continue to feed at the trough. Lindsay Lohan reached for a little Angelou in time of Twitter beef. It’s like the Gatlin gun in old Westerns. The fight is now over.

Jennifer Lawrence invoked Lindsay Lohan’s name  in a metaphor to describe how tired she’s been lately, exhausted to the point of vomiting. Though she disclaimed any drug or alcohol use. Sort of an unnecessary pile-on. Lindsay’s anorexic sister, Ali, who is force fed hummus through a tube like black site Jihadi detainees came to the defense of her sister:

She @LindsayLohan so her sister could see her work and quit moaning about having to help her with rent each month. That’s when Lindsay went Gatlin with Angelou:

@aliana thank you sister.. Maybe who you’re referring to should learn to support others like #mayaangelou

The Lohans fight scrappy. Since neither attended high school, you know it’s innate. Jennifer Lawrence might be some hot shot queen of Hollywood earning equal pay to her male co-stars, but she’s not Long Island rugged like the Lohans. Tussle with an L.I. girl with an ex-con daddy and you will come away with some open thumb punches landed. Keep it to Twitter. The Lohans stretch just to get to sixty characters. Wake me when there’s hair pulling.

Photo credit: Lindsay Lohan/Twitter