Michelle Rodriguez Wants to Buy a Baby

Michelle Rodriguez did another interview where she said she’d never be in a long term relationship because why the hell would you when you can fuck Zac Efron on your rented yacht, pull into port, then fuck Cara Delevingne in the ladies room at a Knicks game without even douching. That’s just thinking like a man. But, Rodriguez is naturally drawn to the idea of renting a chick to make her a baby so she can have something to call her own:

You might get lucky enough to find that unconditional love in a friend or a lover, but it’s very rare. So if I ever have a kid, it’d be so that I could look in those eyes and know that this child is a piece of me and will love me the same way I love, but I think that’s selfish of me.

No, Don’t even think that. Dogs are great, but no matter how the nanny coaxes, they’ll never utter ‘Mommy, I miss you’ into the phone for you to hear while you’re finger banging Portia De Rossi in a rebound fling on a Kenyan glamping safari. Lots of women and unemployed Central American men feel that yearning to make babies to have something to call their own. Don’t think of it as selfish, call it something else, like totally unselfish. You’re famous enough that your friends and the magazines will go along with it.