Akon’s Ferrari Repossessed

Akon is having his Ferrari repossessed because he decided payments on his lease were not in his wheelhouse. He now owes $250k for the car even though its not even worth that much on the Bluebook, not even counting the discounting for the smell of strawberry blunts. Also a car drops twenty-percent the minute you drive it off the lot playing Akon music.

Blowing money on extravagant possessions and winding up broke is just something rappers are expected to do, the same way members of The Eagles are known to diversify their investments. But being insolvent on a car is a special kind of retarded. Akon has spent what could have been a decent mortgage on renting a car for the past four years. On top of that it’s a car too small to live in. Akon will most likely end up going the spiritual route, squatting in a shotgun shack having converted to Islam in an effort to disavow all worldly possessions. In reality this will just be a street rep cover for the fact that he pissed away millions of bucks on teen girl impulse buys at the Beverly Center.

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