Stallone Has High Hopes

Sylvester Stallone posted a photo with his 16 year old daughter Sistine who wants to be a model like how super advantaged children used to want to go to Harvard. Stallone seems like a loving father so I’m curious why he’d encourage this line of work. If you love your dog you don’t want to send it to Westminster to have its jaw measured and orifices prodded by an old British lady with cold hands. Stallone captioned his support via Hooked on Phonics:

Me with my daughter Sistine who wants to be a serious model. I believe you can do it. When my children were card which I’m grateful for.

Yes, I hope all your children were card and suck seed. The difference between a serious model and one who’s dabbling is based on how hot they are. It’s not like you’re out in the field plowing away at your double helix. Once you get the job you just have to stand there and look like you don’t give a damn. Remember that song, I’m a Little Teapot? Okay, now it’s for real. It’s getting to that point where you lose your soul in a Porta Potty which involves the heavy lifting. What is she going to do with that finger?

Photo Credit: Instagram